How to give yourself permission to regroup, reset and refresh
Jean Edelman: Great to be with you this week. This week I want to talk about giving ourselves permission to regroup, reset, refresh and restart our lives. Knowing life is for us, it’s hard to understand. When we have health events, we get so pulled into the event it’s hard to see the bigger picture. But trust me, there is a bigger picture. No matter how tragic or hard the health event is, there’s always higher learning that we are being asked to understand.
For me, as I have shared, 2023 started with a major health event, five days in the hospital. Well, if you know me, you know I don’t like taking drugs and I would never have seen myself in the hospital. Yet there I was, and I had to surrender to the nurses and the doctors to get me through it. So again, I wanted to share my lessons. One was to surrender. You might imagine how hard that is to a point. Others are directing your path. This is part of the learning.
The second was to slow down. I believed I had to do everything. I ran all day, collapsed at night. What for? Why did it have to be done right away? Right then and right there. This was a big change for me. This is something that I’ve practiced all year and I have made great progress in that area. I have healthier boundaries and really looking at what is important.
The third let go of ancestral angst, whatever that is. For me. I needed to stop believing in the survival mode. My ancestors needed to survive. But I live in the 21st century with food stores and hospitals. They had to grow their food and build their shelters. Survival to get through the day was all they knew. But it was passed from generation to generation, and it is something I no longer needed. I speak of this again because I want us to be reminded that we need to give ourselves permission to stop, reset, regroup, refresh and redirect our lives. When these events occurred. If I didn’t look for the higher learning, I would have just stepped right back into my old patterns.
But this was not supposed to be. I feel like we feel as a society that we’re always being judged. There’s this veil of judgment that hangs over us. We think we have to be X; we think we have to… and you fill in the blank. Well, I’m saying it is 2024, and we’ve all had a lot of life lessons in the past few years. And I’m saying, who says that we must do whatever the X is? Who says that we have to be… and you fill in the blank?
Remember wabi sabi – nothing’s perfect, nothing’s complete, and nothing is permanent. This philosophy gives us the space and the grace to make the stop, the reset, the regroup, the refresh, the redirect whenever we need to.
And so my action item for the week; it’s a new year. It’s a good time to sit and look at our life. It’s a good time to sit and look at our patterns. It’s a good time to sit and review and regroup and redirect our commitments and our attitudes towards everything that we encounter. Are we doing things because we have to or because we want to? We want the best life, and we want to be the best version of ourselves. And we can only do that when we continue to give ourselves permission to stop, reset, regroup, refresh, redirect because we are the captain of our ship.
And so my word of the week is to Reset – before a life event happens. Be preventative. Observe where the pinch points are in our life. Make the changes. Say no. Have better boundaries.
So the R is for Reap. Reap the benefits of good self-care, self-awareness and letting go of the fear of change. Reap the benefits of having healthy boundaries. If we don’t listen to our intuition and what we need. When we compromise, we feel worse, and we spiral into negative self-talk. So let’s practice staying positive and listening to ourselves because we know best, and then we get to reap those benefits.
The E is for Eager, to be impatient. We are an instant society, but the reality is that positive, healthy change takes time. Remember the baby steps. For me, it has taken a whole year to get myself back to where I was before I had my health event. But even then, I’m different. This reset, this refresh, this redirect can take time. It can take years to accomplish. But at least we are moving in a positive, healthy direction.
The S is for Solace, comfort, calm and peace. When we reset, refresh and redirect, we get to find a new route for ourselves. It can be more scenic; it will have less traffic and it will be healthier for us.
The E is for Empower, to allow. Consider today the day you give yourself permission, permission to begin the changes you want to see in your life.
And the T; the T is To Care For. We are our own best advocate. When something does not feel right for us, we have permission to speak up and find a better way. We have to remember we only have this one miraculous body. We have this one amazing lifetime. Why would we self-sacrifice? It’s 2024. It’s time for a new, healthier version of ourselves. Have a wonderful week everyone!